8th August 2016
I decided yesterday as you know to wake up early and get loads done first thing, I did wake up early 6am to be precise, but I maybe did two things on my list.. (whoops). I spoke with Aaron while he was on his way to work, when we finished the call I chilled in bed for a little while. This morning I made a decision about something seemingly not very important but something that definitely does make an impact on our day to day lives, Facebook...
I love Facebook so much, I love the idea of social media but I am so so exhausted with the reality of it and of course, the dreaded comments section, I'm always drawn to them because I'm always interested in other peoples reactions to things but sometimes, people can be such arse holes and so vulgar because on Facebook they do not face consequences nor do they have to take responsibility for their words. I'm not a person to stand by and watch while bad things happen and I always try my upmost to remain positive but also make people accountable for their words to try and encourage people to change their mindset and understand that words can hurt and when you do this, usually, you get the name calling and hurtful words tenfold. I'm exhausted with it, frankly I do not give a shit what you have to say about me because I know the difference between right and wrong but, speaking ill of someone who can't defend themselves is just gross, there's no other word for it really. So I have decided to distance myself, I've logged out of the app on my phone so I don't have the notifications constantly and I've decided to limit the amount of time I look at it daily and weekly.
One app I do live for though is snapchat, which brings me on to the rest of my morning, to help myself get in a cleaning mood I put Kisstory on, a blessing and a curse. The music was great and I got loads of miming videos on snapchat to annoy all the people who are insane enough to follow me on it, what this also meant was I got totally distracted and didn't do any of the things I planned this morning. Maybe if you're lucky I'll pop the footage below, haha. I got myself ready and did this dishes (1 thing on my list) on my way out took the rubbish out (another thing on my list).
I walked to the station and called my Mimi to see how she's doing and talk to her a little bit about my experience with the whole Facebook thing. We came off the phone by the time I got on the train, I continued with Kisstory blasting in my ears and experiencing my morning commute without Facebook. I bumped into my friend S's friend on the tube when getting to Greenwich and when we came out of the station we went and collected our lunch from Tesco's together, we parted ways after that as she works somewhere else. I headed up to the office, got logged in, published my last diary entry (which I will promote on Facebook) and started taking calls. I make it to lunch at which point I dedicate half of my break on working on this first diary entry for the week, #bloggerlife #anyfreemomentwilldo I am absolutely dying for a wee though so I might have to get away from this desk before I wet myself! I have a BLT, some blueberries, some black grapes an iced coffee and some crisps, thai sweet chilli sensations, if you were interested... I walk downstairs with my friend T and have a cigarette and catch up about our weekends, I walk her to the station and then walk back to the office and get settled at my desk ready to continue the rest of my shift, I start working on another blog post and time flies of course, before I know it, it's time to log back into the phones.
I start taking calls again at 4:35pm, it's brutal, the two calls I've taken have been absolutely horrid, I've only tried to help with basic things but people don't seem to have any logic. The rest of the shift isn't much easier but some really nice people have cheered me up a bit, my friend Y calls me before I'm about to go on break so I give him a shout when I get downstairs, I try to call Aaron after but there's still no answer so I send a message to find out if he is at home tonight and if he is okay. Eventually my shift draws to an end, I pack my stuff and head home, Aaron still isn't answering, I'm really worried. I get the train and call my friend S once I reach Croydon, I smoke a couple of cigarettes downstairs but it keeps making me sick, so I think I'm going to stop for a little while.
I head upstairs and Aaron is sleeping, blissfully unaware I have been worrying my tits off for easily 2 hours about his whereabouts! I continue my conversation with S until my battery dies, I get myself all washed up and ready for bed, I turn the TV off, put my phone on charge and crawl into bed with Aaron.
9th August 2016
I woke up early, 6am ish, but I do not feel good at all, my stomach is killing me, its so painful I can barely move, I sleep in until I absolutely have to get up but even when I do get up I'm still in enormous pain. I pull myself together and get out of the front door and on the train to work, when I arrive at work I'm in such pain that I have to ask to go home, I get signed off for the day and told to come back when I feel better.
I make my way back home, what a waste of money, I should have just called, but I wanted to try at least. I get back to Croydon head to boots to try and find something to help me but unfortunately they have nothing, I grab some chips and a diet coke from Mc D's, probably not the key to feeling better but I need something. I walk home slowly contemplating getting some food shopping but I cannot manage to carry it home.
I get indoors and flop in bed still in my work clothes, I do not move until the evening, just to get more water and something to eat. The only time the pain isn't completely unbearable is when I'm lying down dead straight. I go to sleep early and hope to feel better in the morning.
10th August 2016
I wake up early again to try and see if I can muster the energy to go to work, today I feel much the same as yesterday. My colleague and friend T texts me and asks if I am coming in today, I'm still undecided at this point but she tells me if I'm anything like yesterday I should just stay home. To be honest with you, I feel even worse today, I decide at about 9am, I'm not going to make it in, I call in sick.
I order some food shopping online because I genuinely cannot move and I have barely anything in the house. I have boiled egg and soldiers again for brunch and a shittonne of water. I watched Legend of the drunken master (another favourite film) and managed to get a little bit of laundry done in the house. Aaron gets home from work and joins my couch (bed) potato situation, he doesn't feel great either. Eventually the food shopping arrives, I put everything away and make a breakfast sandwich for dinner, not amazing but it's something. I have a shower and get ready for bed early I don't have the energy to stay up. We watch a documentary on this cult and I literally passed out at the end of it. To be honest there's not much to report for the last few days I've just been wrapped up in bed.
11th August 2016
Today is my day off anyway but I make a decision that I have to go back to work tomorrow for my own sanity. I do a bit of housework and prepare my dinner following that I literally watch chick flicks back to back, clueless, legally blonde, there was another one but I haven't seen it before so I can't remember what it was but it had Dane Cook in it. Aaron gets back from work, I have a bath, have some dinner and I go to bed, exciting right!?
12th August 2016
We are finally here, the first time I have left my house in 3 days, I get up at about 7:30am, wash and dress myself, have some breakfast and take the rubbish out. I collect some parcels I have waiting for me, my Mario Badescu products have finally arrived, review coming soon. I take them upstairs and grab my stuff to leave for work, I walk down to the station, it's beautiful weather out today, my stomach is still giving the odd pang of pain but it's not extraordinary.
I get to Greenwich with a bit of time to spare so head to Starbucks and get a caramel frappe and ham and cheddar croissant, I get upstairs and logged in and catch up with a couple of friends before I start my shift. From the moment the first call came in all that cabin fever I had from being at home for 3 days disappeared, I wanted to return to my hibernation spot and live in peace watching chick flicks but no, I'm back here. Customer service queen! I had a few meetings today which definitely helped speed up the day. I have also decided to smoke as little as I can as the feeling of it is making me hurl but obviously that need to go outside and have a cigarette is still very present, ESPECIALLY in my working environment.
The only breaks I take today are the ones designated, morning break (15mins) lunch break (1 hour) afternoon break (15mins), it is crazy busy. I manage to work on 1 single sentence of my blog before I get trapped in another wave of calls. Eventually the day ends and I can escape, I decided to stay with Aaron at his mums tonight so I head over on the train. I call my sister and try and contact my grandma to let her know I'll be in the area, but I forgot she's out today. I treat myself to a lavender lemonade from this pretzel place I always walk past at Clapham Junction and spend 5mins trying to get a picture for instagram, its just about passable but I look like a bit of a prick, how the hell am I going to do YouTube?
I get to Aaron's mums road and see the PAAAAL (cat) he's mewing at me so I stand in the middle of the street giving him a tummy rub, I tell him to come home and walk off. I get indoors and we order Chinese food for dinner, Aaron's mum isn't feeling great she had an asthma attack I think yesterday and her chest sounds bad. We watch some of the Olympics (for someone who hates them, I'm starting to get a little into it) then Aaron's mum puts CBB on, I usually don't watch this but OH MY GOD RENEE FROM MOB WIVES IS IN IT!!! I feel like I have missed out now, I'm not going to allow this to suck me in, just a new season of Mob Wives please ITV.
I head downstairs to the garden where Aaron is and have a cigarette, after this I come in and wash my hands and face before getting ready for bed, Aaron makes a little cocoon out of duvets and pillows for me and we drift off.
13th August 2016
Aaron wakes me before he leaves for work, I tell him I love him then ask him to turn the flipping side light off, it's blinding and I don't have to be up for at least another hour! I get out of bed at 8:15am I need to leave at 8:45am, I get up and go for a wee, wash myself get dressed (luckily I packed fresh clothes for some random reason) and get my bag ready. I knock on W's bedroom door to let her know I'm off and I'll see her later and I walk to the station.
I get to the station with enough time, the one thing I don't have is deodorant I go to Superdrug and buy 3 deodorants, one body oil, one moisturiser, dry shampoo (I don't know why, I never use it, I'd rather just wash my hair) and it takes all my self control not to buy a sickly sweet body spray. I then nip over to M&S to buy lunch, I was going to bring my Chinese from yesterday but I am always so unhealthy when I'm away from home, so I grab one big thing of carrot and orange juice (favourite, better when its fresh with ginger too) get a Mexican rice salad thing (its the best salad at M&S) and some Honey BBQ wholegrain snacks (never tried before, Ill update you after lunch). I get to my platform ready to buy myself some breakfast from my usual when I travel from Clapham junction, they've got the board up offering products they don't even have in stock, I leave it because they have literally 2 pastries and thats it, I get my train, hungry as fuck by the way, pay my electric bill and make my way to work.
When I get to Greenwich I repeat yesterday morning, I walk to Starbucks, get a caramel frappe and a ham and cheddar croissant. Everything is great until I realise I've spilt coffee on my brand new, primarily white top, for fuck sakes. Every. Single. Fucking. Time. I cannot wear white to save my life without staining it, how the fuck am I going to cope when I get married, not that it's happening anytime soon but seriously? My wedding dress is going to be trashed by the end of the day! I participate in my own wet t-shirt contest at work and clean the coffee marks off with cold water and washing up liquid (I'm giving away all my secrets now, yes its a stain buster and yes its great for cleaning suede but there is a process). I get logged in and start taking calls, it's crazy busy again today. In the 5 seconds I get between each call me and my friend S manage to have a conversation across the space of about an hour about a handbag I might buy off her, we leave the discussion on her sending some pictures and a price so I can let her know if I want it.
My break arrives and I work on all of the above relating to today, my old phone had the blogger app so I could work as I went but the app isn't available on Apple, why Blogger? You know all these blogging bishes are on iPhones! Shieeet. Anyway, I work through my break and get back on the phones at 12:10pm, I take a couple calls and it's gets quiet and now I have nothing to write about as we are actually in the present moment and nothing is going on in my brain, I need to pee, we can catch up later! I just got a call anyway so I can't talk to you guys, sorry not sorry.
I get through the barrage of calls and manage to survive without losing my temper, its finally lunchtime, we are halfway through the day. I eat my Mexican salad and drink a bottle of water, I have just wrapped up a blog post so I send it to some people in my office and put it out there on Facebook. I walk over to my friend O and ask if I can steal a rollie, I have a chat with him and my other friend O, in the midst of this she makes a joke about staining my top and literally the moment she says it I drop some of the salad AND dressing down the front of me, AGAIN. I take myself to the kitchen and try to get it out, it doesn't happen straight away but I manage to fade it so hopefully it'll come out in the wash, its a Mexican salad dressing though and because of the oil its going to be a bitch to get it out. I go downstairs for my cigarette and come back up and sit with boy O for a bit catching up, we sit in different parts of the office so I haven't seen these guys in a while! My lunch draws to an end and I get myself logged back in on the phones.
It's quiet, peace at last... I use this time to sort my emails and start working on a new blog post.
I have a review coming up guys, get excited, I'm joking, feel how you want but I am excited to share my new HOLY GRAIL with you! It's on and off busy for the rest of the shift, I crack open these honey BBQ wholegrain snacks, they're edible but I'm lost on the BBQ element also the honey element, they're a bit lacklustre, definitely not worth the 95p or whatever it was. I fully cannot wait to get out of here today, but I've got a mission journey coming up, I have to go back to my house, grab stuff, pack a bag and head back over to Battersea, there are no trains running from Croydon tomorrow for my route, but I'm not going to lie, I am so tempted to stay home tonight, I want to try my Mario Badescu products that came in the post, I really need to hoover and I want to iron and hang my clothes for the week ahead. I might tell Aaron I'm staying at home, it's just a bit of a mish, if I had a car it would be fine, but it will be just as problematic getting to work tomorrow from Clapham as it will be from Croydon.
I call Aaron once I finish work and all the above goes out the window, I call my Mimi, I always keep spare clothes ect at her house. She's home so I head over after work and all of our friends from San Francisco are visiting the UK, I catch up with them all, by catch up I mean I talk about myself for ages (I feel really bad about that but sometimes I get caught in the moment) I stay for a couple hours, we chat about whats going on in America with Trump, the police all this madness that gets reported to us over here. It hits about 9:30pm, I really ought to make a move, I grab my clothes and my prescription (finally), give everyone some love and walk down to Aaron's mums house. I try to call Aaron but he's not answering, I hope he's awake, he usually conks out around this time, I call B on my way down anyway because I miss her and I want to see her! We make a plan for me to go over tomorrow for a couple of drinks, I can't go crazy because I have work on Monday but I can have a nice Sunday adult beverage!
I get to Aaron's mums, put my stuff downstairs, catch up with W and head out into the garden with Aaron for a cigarette, we catch up for a little while before I crawl into bed with my brand new book that I'm super excited to read (The life changing magic of not giving a f*ck- Sarah Knight) I get through the first chapter and start feeling sleepy, I decide to set my alarm for work tomorrow and doze off, not giving a fuck about anything.
14th August 2016
My alarm goes off at 7:30am, I'm so cozy I don't want to move, so I don't until 8:20am, now I've only got 20 minutes to get ready, oh well it was worth it. I get in the shower, wash myself, change into some fresh clothes after using my new moisturiser I got yesterday and fix my face and hair. I go upstairs to Aaron and put some stuff in his bag that I couldn't handle carrying around all day, he does it to me all the time (ladies you know what I mean). Anyway, I chill with him for about 10 minutes and he compliments my shirt, it makes me smile because, well, thats MY man and he loves me even in my Sunday worst! We hug it out before I leave and I start walking down to the station, my train is at 9:20am and its 9am, I need breakfast, I decide to risk it and see if I have time to sort breakfast at this end. While I'm walking I get a call from my friend K, I'm in shock I've never seen her up this early unless she has work, I ask if she's okay, obviously and she informs me she's doing a breakfast run, we chat for 40mins while I'm on the train and decide we will meet up probably next week.
I get to Greenwich and call Aaron, I remind him I will be out this evening and find out what his plans are for the day, we finish the catch up we were having indoors and I end the call, I have to get logged into my computer. It's dead quiet on the phones for the first 30mins so I use the time to get cracking on a new blog post, yes guys, I'm going hard, I have a shittone of content for you. I get a couple of calls back to back and I also get a massive headache, I have painkillers but I just want to see if I can get rid of it with water first. I have this spot as well which is fucking hurting, literally so painful, but lets see how much of a G this spot is when I get my Mario Badescu drying lotion on it! I'm hoping for a miracle with this product, before and after shots coming sooner than expected.
I work my way through until lunch and I'm not really hungry but I am gonna eat the other half of my toasted sandwich from earlier. I read some of my book and go and chat with my friend O about this book and self confidence and finding the comfort in being yourself, I have a cigarette downstairs with him and head back up after about 15mins, I go for a wee because that coffee just went straight through me and I call Aaron to remind him, for the love of God, to not forgot the charger cable I left with him! I head back over to my desk and start typing the above, hello, this is a live/not live blog situation here. I have 3 minutes now until I have to get back to my job, if only you knew how much I wish this was my actual job.
I make it through to my next break, I nick a cigarette from one of my friends and head outside for 15 minutes of peace, I call Aaron quickly, it's starting to become quite a draining day, I've worked on a lot of content in the last 24h and I'm starting to get a case of writers block. I have a lot of half finished posts because I have ideas in the middle of my ideas! I decide to take the last bit of my shift to really focus on work and in quiet moments, my book.
Finally it has come to the time I can actually leave work, I get myself packed up and literally run to the station, FREEEEDOM! I hop the train to B's house and try desperately to remember my way to hers, I need to bring a bottle of something but I don't have ID, luckily I get a corner shop man who doesn't give a shit. I pick up a couple of bottles of shitty wine because I am being a cheapskate this week, B is in the same struggle, I literally got paid on Friday and I am JUST about going to tide my way through the rest of the week! I get to her house and see I as well who just got back from a nice trip to the states, we spend the evening catching up with each other, I leave at around 11pm and slyly spend money I don't have on an uber, but her house is about 20mins from mine so it wont be too expensive.
I get indoors, get changed into some pj's, take my before shots, wash my face and try my new Mario Badescu drying lotion, my fingers and toes are crossed to see how this looks in the morning, at the moment, I look like I have been shat on by multiple pigeons. I go to bed hopeful...
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